Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Hello old friend.

It's been a while since I've written here. But times of complete unmotivation to do homework call for posts :)

Something happened to me over the break. It's like a switch that's been flipped over and over, but there's a shortage or (in my case) a broken light bulb that just won't come on. Over break, the Lord used my family to heal me. Since May, all the little pieces of my world have fallen apart, leaving me bitter and broken-hearted, and during the break, I basked in the fact that, unlike others who have hurt me, my family loves me (even when I'm weird). There's nothing for the soul like unconditional love from a human. We get it from God, but sometimes he has to communicate it through tangible beings.

I see now that all the things that have happened were not some dirty trick to make me feel forgotten and alone, but a rescuing of sort. Now, I have no one to dictate to me who I am. All I have left is my family and my God. And I'm to become who I am to become, regardless of what everyone or any one says.

My heart still hearts, and I still feel forgotten at times, but I'm learning.

I guess I'm growing up...haha. yeah right.